


Silence

by SongsofPsyche



Category: The A-Team (2010), The A-Team - All Media Types
Genre: Aftermath, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Muteness, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2014-04-16
Packaged: 2018-01-15 16:34:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1311661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SongsofPsyche/pseuds/SongsofPsyche
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Face’s voice was gone. There was nothing they could do about it. Hannibal blamed himself, B.A blamed the world, but Murdock didn't know who to blame.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Silence

**Author's Note:**

> Please subscribe to my tumblr for updates and info!!
> 
> http://songsofpsyche13.tumblr.com

Everything was different.

Face’s voice was gone. There was nothing they could do about it. Hannibal blamed himself, B.A blamed the world, but Murdock didn't know who to blame. It had all happened so fast, even if one of them had known, there would have been nothing they could do to stop that explosion from happening. The explosion that had allowed them to rescue Face from his captors had caused more damage than anything that they could have imagined. 

So now they sat in silence in the small cabin’s living room. Each not looking at each other, each afraid to look one another in the eye and silently listening to the shower running. They had been here for three days, Murdock had flown them in on the helicopter he managed to borrow. Face had been asleep for most of it, today was the first day he was strong enough to get up on his own. The first day he was lucid enough to realize that he’ll never be able to speak again.

They tried to ignore the voiceless sobs coming from the shower, just loud enough over the water for them to understand that Face was not taking this well. Face always did this; hiding his emotions from them until he was alone, or thought he was alone. They all knew of his past, and that his demons haunted him almost everyday. But, like all things, they learned to deal with it. In the 12 years that they had worked as a team, they had learned how to accept the nightmares, panic attacks, and sullen mood swings from their Faceman. This was just one more thing to add on to the ever-growing list of what defined the lieutenant. 

The shower stopped, and Murdock felt the tension in the room rise. What would they do now? What would they say when Face walked out of that shower and stared at them for the first time? Murdock saw Hannibal wince slightly, and knew he was thinking the same thing. A few moments later, the door opened and Face stepped out fully dressed in jeans and a plaid button down top. Murdock’s eyes were immediately drawn to the red scars on Face’s neck that showed prominently against his white skin. 

Murdock remembered when they were back in the hospital, just three days before when Face had first woken up. The doctors had explained to him that they had saved his life, but the damage to his throat had been too great. He would never be able to speak again. Face had shaken his head, his lips forming the words “no” but no sound came from his mouth. He had tried again, and again to shout, to scream that it wasn't true, that his voice wasn't really gone. Murdock had known Face long enough to sense when a panic attack was coming, and had tried to calm down his friend but Face had flinched away from his touch, still mouthing words silently. Just another figment of his imprisonment unrolling. What else had been done to him? If only they had reached him earlier, maybe none of this would have happened. It had taken two pairs of hospital restraints and a sedative to calm Face down, and after that the team learned to not touch him. 

“Hey Facey.” Murdock said after a stretch of silence that had gotten uncomfortably long. Face gave him a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.

“How ya doin, kid?” Hannibal asked.

Face just shrugged, keeping his eyes on the floor. He hadn't looked any of them straight in the eye yet. Hannibal stood up, taking a few steps towards Face, Murdock saw Hannibal wince as Face flinched away from his outstretched hand.

Hannibal lowered his hand. “Why don’t you sit with us for a bit?” he asked, pointing to the couch.

Face shrugged again, his lips moved as he tried to say something and winced as nothing came out. He shook his head and Murdock could tell that all Face wanted to do was to escape back into his room. Part of him wanted to let Face go, but a stronger part of him knew that the leutienent shouldn't be alone right now.

“Just for a little while, Facey. Until dinnertime?” Murdock asked softly, then he stood up and offered Face the chair he was sitting in. Face sighed then nodded, and he sat in the chair. Murdock smiled, then perched himself on the edge of the sofa arm.

No one spoke, or looked at each other or moved at all.

Murdock watched Face silently pick at a thread in his jeans with shaky hands. Was he nervous? Were they making him uneasy, just sitting here like this? Somebody should say something. Anything to break this awful silence.

“There’s a lake, just down the hill from here.” Murdock said, his voice finally breaking the silence.

“And a dock, for fishing.” he added

That earned him a half smile from Face. They had loved to fish during their spare time, in-between missions.

“Remember that time you caught that catfish? It was almost as big as I was.” Murdock said.

“I remember that, I had to come rescue your dumb ass, it pulled ya in the water.” B.A added with a toothy grin.

Murdock laughed a little, B.A had not been happy about getting his hair wet.

Face smiled, and for a second Murdock saw a glimpse of the old Face in those crystal blue eyes, but then it vanished as Face tried to say something, his mouth opening and only a raspy sound coming out. The smile faded, and the moment was gone.

They were back to that awkward silence almost as if it had never left.

Murdock finally managed to catch Hannibal’s eye, and was surprised to see that Hannibal looked just as lost as he felt.

Hannibal sighed, and then finally spoke;

“Kid, I am so sorry that this happened. I am telling you now though, I never leave a team member behind. We are going to work through this, we are going to find a solution. Everything is going to be fine, I promise you that.” he finished, looking up at Face.

Face nodded, eyes glassy. He looked so lost, Murdock just wanted to hug him. But then he remembered that Face didn't like anyone touching him, or even coming close to him so he just sat there.

Everything was now different, how did they come to this?

888


	2. Dinnertime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Murdock sighed. Did Face know it was them that caused the explosion that hurt him so? He thought back to the lieutenant, with his knack for details and extensive plans.
> 
> Yes. Yes, he knew.

888

Dinner was a silent affair. In more ways than just the obvious.

Murdock made soup, not only because he knew Face still had a hard time swallowing whole food but also because chicken soup seemed to always be a symbol of comfort. Murdock hoped that it would help Face understand that he would always be there for him. It was also his way of saying sorry.

Murdock felt the guilt bubble up in his fully functioning throat as he watched his soup steam in his spoon. If he has just gotten to face sooner, if he has just realized a little sooner that Face was still in there when he created the bomb. Maybe none of this would of happened.

Face mouthed thank you when Hannibal offered to refill his glass of water, and Murdock didn't know if Face had forgotten that he couldn't speak, or if he hadn't and was trying to appear normal. 

Hannibal smiled at Face, “No problem, Kid. Be sure to eat your soup before it gets cold.” he said, in a rare Mother Hannibal voice. Face nodded, and stuck his spoon full of soup in his mouth, and winced as he swallowed.

“Still hurt?”

Face nodded.

“That’s okay. The doctors said it would for a few day.”

Fce gave a little sigh and fiddled with his food, not looking any of them in the eye. Murdock could only imagine how hard this was for him. Face usually was the life of the conversation, always laughing, always talking and now it was like that light in him had been extinguished.

Murdock looked over at Hannibal, who for once was still and quiet but still had his scheming face on. An improvement from earlier-atleast he wasn't a blank slate anymore.

“You may be insane, but this is damn good soup.” BA said through a mouthful.

“I’m glad you like it.” Murdock answered with a smile. he looked over at Face, who had just put a spoonful in his mouth. Face swallowed and smiled. He mouthed “it’s good” silently, then gave him the thumbs up. 

“Im glad you like it too, Facey.” 

Murdock answered. Face then said something else, his lips moving but no sound coming out. it was like he was on mute, and murdock had no idea what he said. Face must have realized that murdock dint understand because he stopped mid work and put his hand on his throat. that, or he had forgotten he couldn't speak anymore. 

Murdock didnt know which was worse.

Face ducked his head and Murdodck felt his heart break just a little bit.

“Dont worry, we’ll work this out, I promise. Just contrite on getting better now though.” he said, trying to be a comfrot.

“Yeah. Hannibal already has a plan, I can tell.” B.A added with a smile.

Hannibal nodded, “I like I said before, this will all work out, Kid. Just trust me.”

Face smiled a little, then took another bite of soup.

When they were finished with dinner, it was already too dark outside to go fishing but Murdock promised they would go first thing after breakfast in the morning.

Even though they hadn't done much, except for sit, eat and stare at each other, Face already looked exhahusted. they filtered back into the living room after cleaning up the dishes, Face hesitated before staring at the solitary chair. he looked up at Murdock, then pointed towards the hallway that lead to his room.

“Not just yet, kid. We need to ta-discuss a few things first.” Hannibal said as he walked into the liveng room. He reached out to touch face on the arm, only as a gesture of reassurance, but Face flinched away from his grasp with a quick intake of breathe.

Hannibal froze, but then he stepped back respectfully.

“Sorry, sorry Face I forgot.” he whispered.

They all had. It was such a common thing to forget, that face didn't like being touched anymore. it was just another reminder of how little they knew of Face’s captivity and how much Face had changed in just a few days. 

Hannibal waits until Face has sat down to move over to the couch. Murdock sat on the floor next to Face’s chair, eager to hear the solution that Hannibal had for them.

“I think it’ll be in our best intrest to start learning ASL—American Sign Language. We will all learn it, together. I got us a computer with internet. It may take a while, but it’s a start. Until then, Face are you comfortable writing notes?”

Face nods without looking anyone in the eye.

“Good. Now go get some rest, all of you. We don’t have to start tonight, maybe tomorrow.” He says, looking from Face, to Murdock to B.A.  
Face then stands up and points to the hallway.

“Yes. Goodnight Face, we’ll see you in the morning.”

“Night Facey.” Murdock chimes in. Face gives him a half smile before walking down the hallway.

Hannibal waits until he hears the door shut to speak.

“He still won’t let me touch him.” he says, in a thin whisper. 

His eyes flash up, “We have to find out what happened, what they did to him-before we came in.” he says.

“The doctors didn't find any signs of foul play.” B.A said.

“You can do things without leaving signs. These were trained assassins.”

Hannibal sighed, and Murdock knew he was remembering after the explosion, when they found the lieutenant bound helplessly to a table in the ruble of what was once their enemy’s fortress— four days after they realized he had been taken. If only they had found him sooner, none of this would have happened.

“I dont think he would tell us now even if he could, but we all know Face. He’ll tell us when he’s ready. He always has. We’re like his family, he trusts us.” Murdock said, trying to sound reassuring.

Hannibal looked up at him, “Does he?”

And Murdock sighed. Did Face know it was them that caused the explosion that hurt him so? He thought back to the lieutenant, with his knack for details and extensive plans.

Yes. Yes, he knew.

That very thought made Murdock’s heart sink. How were they ever going to get through this?

888


	3. Card Games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Theres so much we don’t know, he’s changed so much and I dont know how to fix him. I miss the old Face, Hannibal.”
> 
> Hannibal was silent for a minute, “Me too.” he finally said.

888

Murdock sat across from Face on the floor by the mantle both engrossed in their game of cards that stretched between the two. It had been two days since Face had been functioning enough to be out and about in the cabin. Hannibal wouldn't let him go outside though, after he had found the remnants of an abandoned mineshaft right in their backyard, he’d thought it would be safer for them to clear it out first before letting Face explore. If Face did get himself into danger, he would have no way to call for help. So inside he stayed. Murdock tried his best to entertain his friend, and then he discovered Face’s love for learning new card games.

Face grabbed a nine and went to put it underneath the ten, but hesitated and looked up at his friend.

"That's right." Murdock assured him. Face smiled and confidently put the card down. Murdock laughed,

"That leaves me to do this"

And he put his line of straight cards underneath the 9, claiming the pile.

Face snorted and put his hands up in the air.

"Winning is all about confidence, brother."

Face smiled and shook his head, putting his hands underneath his chin, he examined the cards, plotting his next move.

Murdock watched his friend, and was glad that so far, today had been a good day. Today was the first time Face had yet to relapse back into the dark memories that so often haunted him since the accident. The first time he came out of his room by himself, the first time he reached out to Murdock and asked for him to teach him a card game, instead of the other way around. Murdock took this as a huge sign of improvement. Maybe, just maybe Face was starting to trust them again.

He watched as Face picked up a red four, and tried to stick it underneath a red five.

"Hey! That's cheating." He warned him, and Face gave him a confused look.

"It had to go red, black, red. Two of the same cant go next to each other. Remember?"

Face scoffed noiselessly, then pointed to the card that Murdock had played earlier; a red queen, next to a…

Red King.

Oops.

"Well, uh that rule doesn't apply to the face cards." Murdock bluffed effortlessly.

Face rolled his eyes, and then held up his hands, then signed something in ASL.

Murdock frowned, he didn't know that sign. Face had taken to ASL easily, and without a fight. There had been concerns before that Face would be reluctant to learning the sign language, for it would indicate that he had accepted that his voice was truly gone. But, Face seemed eager to learn, so they did their best to teach him. The videos Hannibal found were easy enough to follow, and soon Face knew more signs then all of them. Hannibal, of course, was a natural at it already but It wasn't as easy for Murdock or B.A though, Murdock found the signs too confusing and the grammar tedious. B.A was just impatient. But regardless of how tough it was to learn, ASL did make conversations easier between the two friends.

"I don't know that one, but I assume it's something I wouldn't want to know." 

Face just smiled, and then spelled the word out for him L-i-a-r.

Murdock laughed, ”It was an honest mistake, make your move it you want. Even though it is technically wrong." he commented and silently thanks the Lord for this rare but good mood.

When they finished the game (Face had won, even thought he cheated just a little) Murdock reshuffled the cards and smiled at his friend.

“So what do you want to do now, amigo? Are you tired? Hungry?”

Face still had a hard time communicating with them about what he wanted, not because he couldn't but because he was too proud to ask from help. Murdock found it was best just to flat out ask him, 80% of the time Face would give him an honest answer, and that was good enough for Murdock.

Face shrugged, and then pointed out the window then made another sign that Murdock didnt know.

“You want to clean the windows?”

Face smiled, but shook his head. He pointed to the window again, and then mouthed go outside. 

“Ohhh you want to go outside! I know Hannibal was a little worried because of those mines hafts he and B.A found, but I don't think it’ll be a problem if we just sit on the porch.” Murdock answered.

Face seemed content with this answer. He nodded and gave Murdock a rare smile.

Murdock stood, and then offered his friend a hand up. Face flinched a little bit and froze. Murdock sighed, he had forgotten again that Face didn't like to be touched. And was once again reminded that there was a lot to Face’s story that he did not know.

“Sorry Facey. I forgot, I didn't mean to scare you.” Murdock whispered softly. Face shrugged without looking him in the eye. He pushed himself up to standing by himself, and then motioned with his hand to the door.

“Yeah, let’s go.Im sure Hannibal wouldn't mind if we just sat out on the deck.” Murdock said, following Face outside.

Face walked to the edge of the deck and put his hands on the railing, looking up at the darkening sky.

“So todays been a good day?”

Murdock jumped at the voice behind, he turned to see Hannibal sitting in one of the rocking chairs and smoking a pipe.

“Yes. I suppose so. As good as it can get.”Murdock answered.  
“That’s good.”

“He’ll be safe here on the deck, right?” Murdock asked, turning to Hannibal.

Hannibal nodded, “Its pretty sturdy, and BA did a good job tracking down the rest of the mines today. We could head out to the lake tomorrow, if we are all feeling up for it.”

“That’s great. I know he’s been wanting to go.” Murdock answered, sitting down on a wooden block next to Hannibal.

“He still wont let me touch him.” Murdock whispered after a beat of silence.

“Theres so much we don’t know, he’s changed so much and I dont know how to fix him. I miss the old Face, Hannibal.”

Hannibal was silent for a minute, “Me too.” he finally said.

“But we have to be grateful we didn't loose him completely. He’s still here, and that’s all the matters.”

Murdock nodded, and as he watched his friend look up at the sky he smiled, Hannibal was right. Just like always.

888

**Author's Note:**

> Please subscribe to my tumblr for updates and info!!
> 
> http://songsofpsyche13.tumblr.com


End file.
